I don’t want to burst your bubble or anything, but the Internet is a lie. Pretty much everything that goes viral is manufactured and engineered for specifically that. Even this blog posting is being written by a seasoned team of experts that specialize in creating content that will eventually get shared thousands of times, resulting in hits to our website. Well, not really. I’m just sitting here at my computer typing this post all by myself. It’s true. I’ll even take a selfie as evidence.
See? There I am, typing what you’re reading. Or did we cleverly insert a photo into text that was ghostwritten?
You know that story that was going around on Facebook about the little girl that was allegedly asked to leave a KFC because her scarred face was disturbing the other customers? As the story goes, she had scars on her face from a pit bull attack and the family made a big Internet and news stink about how an employee made them leave because her scars were scaring other customers. The world was outraged. Even the owner of the KFC apologized and offered to donate $30,000 to her medical funds. Others pledged donations of another $100,000 after the story went viral. (This is the Internet, and I am blindly regurgitating figures that I’m reading from a variety of articles.)
Well, now it turns out that the whole thing is allegedly a hoax. At least according to what is trending on the Internet today. Now sources are saying (I haven’t actually researched this, either) that there is evidence (that I have personally not seen) that the family never even entered the restaurant at all. Here is a link to an article by someone who may or may not have actually researched this. I’m just blindly sharing.
Let me show you how to get attention on the internet. Think of a headline that will get people pissed off, and then cause them to click on your link and share it. How about this?
City Makes Firefighters Pay For Water When Fighting Fires.
That will spark outrage, don’t you think? I thought it up because I looked out the window just now and saw a fire truck waiting at the red light on 500 South. Then I added something ridiculous, and there you have it: instant Internet outrage. I could post it as fact, share it on the Internet, and we’d have ourselves a three-ring circus! I could also add below the headline “What happened next will make you cry.”
So be wary of anything you find on the Internet. It is usually fiction. Oh, and share this link, please. I need the click-through traffic to increase our web hits for the month.
As far as the whole KFC thing goes, it now appears that it didn’t happen. Or maybe the hoax story is actually a hoax. The only thing I know for sure is this: fried chicken sure is yummy! (This will likely outrage PETA.)
I am the boy on the right.
Thanks for listening,